if only there was time...

wishing you were somehow here again, wishing i still had the time, wishing there was time to feel again, wishing there was time for rhyme...

head laid here

wherever i lay my head
is the place i call my bed
been so long since my homestead
wherever i lay my head
is the place i call my bed
rosebud was more than a sled
wherever i lay my head
is the place i call my bed
forgot everything i ever said
wherever i lay my head


themes run through the blogs like blood through viens and every now and then, as you who've been around these babbles a long time know, we get a bleeder (analogy for the babbler hitting stride and thousands of words later, icing the cake with a multitude of mixed metaphors, at least...

unfortunately, there's no time for thousands of words tonight, as usual, for i must sleep a bit so i can crunch numbers and create reports tomorrow if there's no major investigation to distract me from the data analysis and reporting i must get done before thursday cuz that's the job, among other things...

it's been a long time since i had the time to spend time taking the time to run on and on rambling through time babbling all the time the way i used to (all together now) once upon a time... even more timely, it's been even longer (in terms of time) since i've had the time to give the time to time travellers timing their time through this babbling place (and time) to find the wonders of madness and profoundness and folly and wisdom(ness?) and the answers to the questions nobody ever asks and the lasting meaningfulness of the questions everybody wants to ask (but just don't have the time) like just who is florence and the machine, anyway?...

so, just for you, i drank two cans of coke and two cans of brisk (iced tea) and wonder, along with letterman (cuz craig isn't on until later) just whop needs two cases of philly cream cheese, anyway?... and of course we all jump up as one to scream (for the cream, after all), i do, i do... cream cheese lovers of the world, unite, which of course means the yankees must win the world series because we want the cheese... creamed, of course...

and what's the deal with windows 7, cha... they've slapped it on the new netbooks (which doubled in price since release, demonstrating that greed continues to dominate the american way, along with microsoft's industry leading greedful charging extra for windows xp, an operating system they no longer support and intend to completely abandon in a year or two, therein abandoning their monopolized customers even more than they have already... trust them, sure, the american way has a worm in it... a lot of worms, actually... and the true anti-americans are those who deny and hide this fact, but greed will out until the empire crumbles...

and then i think, well, what it i came back here to (where am i, anyway?... ahhh, oohhhh, wait, ooooo, for a moment there i though i was at diaryland again and just for that, i shall go there now (blink)...

wait, i meant *poof*

.

.

.

.

.

there, that's better (noting that each dot above represents at least ten minutes or more and the insanity of the obstacles at diaryland ironically brought me back here before the entry was complete over there because microsoft sucks, again, as vista is pissing all over the fun computers can be and this moment is no different as the cut and paste feature went away so words were lost again and i curse the fools who created the buggy software and the fools we are for supporting their ineptitude (and greed, don't forget the greed that compels them to carelessly distribute faulty products because they have a virtual monopoly and probably pay the apple corp to keep their mac high priced cuz if the mac cost the same as the pc i'd give up microsoft in an instant and so would you if you were not afraid of change and had any sense at all...

so this entry may continue in a much more positive place and time (later even), but for now, it is posted just like this, tainted with the blood straight from the microsoft daggers and pissed on too, i conclude cuz i must shut down the (microsoft sucks) browser cuz cut/copy and paste stopped working and maybe (microsoft sucks) the computer too... love you in spite of it all...

narf!

speaking of sleep...

sleep?...

to perchance?...

therefore i do what?...

meanwhile, if there was only more time in the days of this life i would visit this word-space more often for amusements appear to be appearing here right before my eyes (does that mean they exist right before my eyes or only behind my eyes is not the question, whatever it is better to be)...

personally, once fear is disemboweled, everything is amusing, musical even, in it's own way... even could be a serious thought provoked or inspired (and what is the difference, after all?... even though i almost always only answer questions i find amusing, i usually wander around and behind and about a point so much i forget whatever it might be i first started to say in my response and therin create my own questions within the word-play that forms between the ears hanging from the head in which i think i reside in some strange way (ever the understater, or understatesman, for that matter, though personally, i'd rather be understateswomen, but that's another story i've long forgotten for the moment), or so it seems after i pause to look up at the screen and see what the fingers at the end of the hands attached to the arms extending from this body i loosely call mine might have done... what?)... yes.

i think i've been dead, therefore i may have not been, but i think i am now, so am i?...

sleep?

who's in charge, anyway?

computers can be ridiculous sometimes, especially when they suddenly cannot locate paths to files that are used regularly… the paranoid can wonder if there’s a sudden virus or intrusion by some stranger invading their computer privacy identify theft and so on (aren’t buzz words amazing?) and the intellectual cynics can curse Microsoft for the faulty software they churn out that has so many routine errors that the hackers can be masked cuz who knows when it’s a bug and when it’s a cyber-rape…

and will spending money on an anti-virus internet security program help or simply further complicate (hmmmm, simply further complicate… now there’s a sweetly appropriate phrase for humanity that would have many legendary minds from freud to socrates to shakespeare to descartes laughing {that is, if they had senses of humors, or humours, after all} cuz irony is amusing when you step back and stop taking everything so seriously, at least in books like the hitchhiker’s guides, ya know?) the question (or quest for an answer, yeah, quest ion is the quest for an answer, gotta love the language, but that’s sort of beside the point, isn’t it)…

are we having fun yet?...

life is kind of like a sanitized horror movie, the clean-up crew is us, or at least those of us who chose ignorance whether through religion or propriety or just plain old ordinary mental blindness brought on by fear… how many brain cells have you turned off (or killed) today?... yeah, why get serious, it’s all just way too funny… like the news constantly reminds us, we need to be concerned, we need to fear, worry, be self-righteously upset and above all else, we need to know… the news is the best soap opera out there, for those into soap operas, that is… at least horror movies show you the guts and gore and crap… I mean, people do do actually go to the bathroom in real life, after all…

while all the boys are rushing over to thesuperficial (yes, the site is real and terribly amusing once you get past the puritan ethic and glazed over narrative quasi-worshipping {or is that whoreshipping?} the latest celeb fads to see (or get a gander of, even) hot shots of jessica alba’s butt, all the boys still awake, that is, cuz most of the world does sleep after dark, after all, but I never could imagine why when the night is the most fun part of the day, we’ll just sit here fondling our language and linguistically masturbating (what?... you don’t masturbate several times a day in a variety of ways?... what are you, strange?) in our minds… idle hands my eyes, aye?...

if there ever was a point to this entry (and you know there always was, though quite often it gets lost in all the words {doe-eyed stare,, cha know}, but rarely does the human mind follow the trains of thought rushing through the station that is a blog post, entry and exit, no doubt… track number nine and three quarters , if you please… we wouldn’t want to be accused of not being normal, after all… phoebe cates too…

stay the course, full speed ahead, and stroke, stroke, stroke…

some of the strangest entries come from allowing random images from whatever happens to be on tv at the moment I am writing (especially when randomly changing channels at random moments while tapping keys), but the internet can be even stranger as there’s less censorship and therefore, more randomness… randomness is so much fun sometimes… and strange, so very strange…

which came first, propriety or paranoia… I mean, does the obsession with being normal and right create the paranoia or does the paranoia create the obsession with being normal and right… that is the question that should have been asked, but then, it was, it just might have been too simplified for the masses in to be or not to be… to be what? after all, that is the question too… there are always questions within questions, ya know, layers of knowledge and intricacy that (wait for It, wait for it) simply complicates everything…

which came first, the simple or the complex… of course there are many who’d argue that the simple had to come first because the complex is built on combining simples in various orders and structures and interwoven manners until a complex is produced, but there may still be a few of the mind that the whole started first and everything came from some big bang when the whole was dispersed into an infinite number of simples, or simplers, at least… it depends on whether you see the universe from the big picture on down or from the components of the atoms on up… elementary, my dear Watson, and the ultimate difference between minds may simply be the answer to the query, but who’s in charge, anyway…

whatever you get out of it, I hope it was good :)

in what?

real time, it was real time, that's the ticket, the path, the mantra, the theme park we created and came to play in long ago or only yesterday, depending upon which real time line we compare to this moment... ah, but fools we are, we stare blankly wondering what it all means (in the myriad of moments that lead to truth if you follow far enough and can see)...

you may just find it...

once there was a way
but then they say
you can’t go home again
still

once there was a way
and who are they
forsake way back when
still

once there was a way
a song would play
and touch us deep inside
still

once there was a way
a yesterday
that can not be denied
still


and after all this time, or a moment, i still do not sleep when this body sighs with exhaustion for the moment my eyes close, knowing there’s so little time before I must spend another day at work and not have a day to myself (the selfishness of the mind is still so prevalent, at least in my mind… and I wouldn’t have it any other way because it is one of the keys, if not the key to me, the awareness and perspective and particular personality that is me and I miss me, a lot, quite often, in fact, more than anyone else, even, and I still hope I am not the only one, cha know?) and the brain starts firing chemicals back and forth between synapses and the thoughts stir the feeling and the feeling stir the thoughts and the universe spins faster and faster…

but the babbler laughs and plays this silent game, instead of rambling on and on as was so often the way in the past moments that were real time before this moment, or whenever you might be reading… and the brevity amuses me in it’s novelty, if nothing else, for it poses pondering for anyone, or at least for me, who might attempt to understand and make some sense, to seek consistency and normalcy (ah, the rebel child wins again)…

the soup is still good...

and you, dear reader, what goes on between your ears, or under them, for that matter?... how are you, where are you, who are you, what are you now, in real time? :)

political suicide

most policitions prefer not to commit political suicide, which is why it is so rare for a politicion to actually get real and speak the truth about government and business and most anything in life.... this leaves us vulnerable cuz we really don't know who to vote for based on any real knowledge, so the whole election process is a waste of time...

to that end, since i don't sleep, i found my representatives and share them with you cuz they deserve closer scrutiny by more people and you are trusted readers who can judge for yourselves and feel free to comment cuz your opinions matter to me, especially when it comes to stuff i pay little attention to, like politics...

see here:


seems pretty normal for the deep south, but take heart cuz my representative used to be semi-crazy, just look:

there are magic hours

deep within the night there is energy beyond cause or reason, beyond rhyme or explanation, beyond wonder and all that we think we know in the mortal coil of human existence and further, beyond all the flights of fancy in the stories we've read and told through the ages from hades to hogwarts, from horatio to hefner, the ones who lead humans from the traps of fear within their own minds through the myriad of confusing emotions and ignorance into evolutionary leaps of consciousness and awareness, there is magic that can only be experienced through accepting being as it is, one with the infinite eternity... and some call it faith, some blind faith, some scientific exploration, whatever the words, the true understanding is only approached with the acceptance that it is beyond words...

and we keep looking for the words to express what can not be spoken... and we keep looking for the words that can only be heard in the heart... and we keep looking for the words that will elate or repair what is broken... and we keep looking for the words that tell us how and where to start... but the answer is far beyond words whether profound prose or the sweetest rhyme... the answer is the moment of acceptance of being in all space and time...

so much more can be said if only there was time...

perhaps another time...