when i knew more

maybe i eluded to it in the previous unfinished entry (and in some of the links there and maybe here as well and it seems there is a pattern of unfinished entries in recent years and large gaps of time (at least) between entries as well because the babbler is simply not given the time to babble as the babbler once did and that is so sad for many reasons, one being that it may be evidence of the success in the endeavor i was pretending to actually want on the right sidebar there, that is, to be like other humans (it never worked because even when i am playing being human well {that is an oxymoron if you get it} by anyone's standards, other humans can tell i am faking it, even when i forget i am faking it and get lost in the frailties and ignorance and forget who i am and all i know {which is all that is available to anyone who dares to open their mind to everything} and act as stupidly as the average normal human being and lose my mind, others sense it even if they don't know either... or something like that), wondering if it's wasted time...

when i knew more
it was only because i remembered
everything is within our reach
if we practice what we preach

you knew more
before you learned how to analyze
before you learned to close your eyes
before you gave fear first prize

show me someone not driven by fear
and we'll see someone who can be aware
that everything has always been right here
just waiting for you to find
that it is right there in your mind

time is a puddle and moments are droplets, each creating ripples moved outward in all directions to allow infinite possibilities, ripples often overlapping, and that is just the beginning of understanding time... scratching the surface just a bit further, the human mind seeks to limit awareness of infinite possibilities because that would confuse a mind that has not evolved to process everything at once but the potential is there in human beings in the 90 plus percent of brain cells not used in most lifetimes... some might say there are spirits in the periphery and others might say those spirits are simply beings who process information differently and exist in dimensions beyond current human perception... there are so many explanations possible for the massive volume of knowledge unknown to human beings at this point in time that humans fixate upon, this now that humans do not seem to understand or accept as the filtered moment in a fluid ocean of time... is fluid ocean redundant?... only if we forget to consider there might be a frozen ocean or a an ocean of energy in each individual or in the infinite oceans of time or any number of phrasologies common or uncommon in the limited human languages...

for it is what we choose to not understand (or misunderstand, as confusion seems to comforting to the human condition) that we do not understand and that defines our limits and it is our limits that decides (and creates) our ignorance and it is our ignorance that determines our individuality for if everyone had no limits we would all be aware that we are all part of one entity whether we call it universe or multiverse or infiniverse or heaven and hell or whatever we call it, when we are aware that it is a choice then we can shake off the fear and stop shirking responsibility for our choices and actions and start being less the human frailty of limited thinking and more the human potential of the open mind...

once i came here daily, or almost daily, for a couple of years or so... the last few years, or more, i chose to live a life not allowing myself the time it takes to pour enough words into the blog box to create what i call babble which is what may be happening here as i take extra time away from the 24/7/365 work i do (and sleep) to let the mind stretch beyond the usual daily limits into thoughts and what we could call awareness if we want to accept and explore the potential of possibilities in the ideas pouring into words and the words pour into the box... as if you open your eyes and suddenly see something so obvious that you didn't even notice before and if you expand on that perception you realize it was always there, it just feels like it was not there before because you chose to limit your perception and awareness to it until the moment you realized it was there all along, whatever it is...

if you open your mind to all that is around you, you gain control of so much more than you know when you limit your mind to only part of your surrounding reality...

this may continue, but for now, suffice to say life was a whole lot easier and simultaneously felt a whole lot lonelier and a whole lot less lonely when i knew more...