dire apathy (or is that ambivalence?)

desparation or desperation, for that matter... desparate desolation desperate desire, too faint for despair or any powerful feeling, too tired for anything but last gasps...

the beautiful people starve themselves physically and ethereally in order to appear attractive in the physical world, but how do they really experience the physical life, what does their bowel movements look like, and how healthy are they really on a cellular level?... does anybody really know?...

the whales and dolphins will come ashore in droves in the years before the end as the earth adjusts itself to the poison emitted from the human race, the viral species infecting the planet with more ferocity every few thousand years until it creates an imbalance in the life of the planet that finally causes a reaction in the ecosystem,, the gaia, the life…

the ultimate cure for cancer is death…

horror movie fans might enjoy the conclusion and Disney fans might be disappointed, unless, of course, there is enough enlightenment to perceive the happy ending includes the elimination of the virus and the healing can appear a painful sacrifice or much of the status quo we believe we know…

the helpless may look above and cry out the most powerful human catch words, young, innocent, youth, innocence, helpless, powerless, weak, frail, humble, the attraction permeates all cultural bounds, young, innocent… the call of the wild, the plea for mercy, and above all else, the abandonment of responsibility through the claim of ignorance and helplessness even as choices and actions kill and destroy…

blinded by the hypocrisy of repression and delusion, any logic or truth that is not conforming to the fear based distorted perceptions that build layers of lies and confusion that passes for human life is met with mass condemnation and ostracism or lynching…

could be the left wrist is suffering from the long term inflammation akin to carpal tunnel syndrome or perhaps some form of label related to arthritis as swinging the bat is more challenging with each passing week even as the mind craves more and more of the game, so glove, wrap, tape, strap, and swing with care and some reservation (or is that control) and less power for the rest of this life, or at least until the pain passes, if it is temporary…

and wondering if activia addiction is born more of taste buds fooled by sorbitol and should stevia replace the yellow stuff now?… the activia stuff is supposed to be healthy, right?... and vegetarians are supposed to be healthy and wise, right?... but what do we really know about life and biology or any science in the end?... is it not, on the grand scale, the universal perspective, only microns apart from the spiritual faith that pure science calls delusional thinking?... the difference between theory and fact is how many people believe it to be true…

and truth is rarely more than the majority opinion…

oh, I do miss you, few dear reader friends who actually care about whatever it is you care about that brings you back here from time to time… me, maybe, which is so refreshing in this world of superficial trivial selfishness and careless insensitivity that dominates the human experience most of the time… oh, I know, it could mostly be cynicism or looking at the glass as half empty, but then, the glass could be half empty too… the fact as experienced in the real is an aloneness and absence of active caring (is it time for the violins?) that is not initiated by me… maybe that’ll change with the next change which is changing in a couple of weeks and then the next change which is changing in a few months…

I’m sure we’ll know if we continue reading, aye? (narfing giggles)…

and meanwhile, in the babbling brook, the words have been flowing big time into the personal communication (and egocentric oratory that comes with it) of personal messages on facebook and perhaps, as so often has been the pattern in the past, a whole series of the essence of those long winded messages, at least the words I wrote, will appear here or somewhere as entries that bask in the glorious ambivalence of the mass silence of cyberspace…

well, except for you very special precious few, but mostly, when we look at the universe, we are but a speck of silence barely visible in the night sky from any other potentially alive planet and as bloggers in the internet experience popularly called the blogosphere, we are almost as isolated and invisible, relatively writing…

the dolphins and whales understand…

still, from the very beginning (found somewhere offline, but alluded to somewhere in written gardens online on the very first page ever uploaded into this electronic ether, there is always hope (I hope :)

so yay and continue :)