emocentricity

my journey tonight did not take me to snow in Celebration because… i was influenced by the couch potato… i was tired and gave into my own laziness… mindless self-indulgence… complete cop out… chose to vege here instead… youtube doesn't do it justice… all of the above, except the youtube, just cuz some nights are lazier and more self-indulgent than others… you'd think i got all that out last night, aye?… in any case, here we are… i may wake at 6am to run tomorrow instead, but i doubt it… sleep is necessary too and tomorrow there's a party about an hour away in the Weikiva Forest that starts at 2pm tomorrow and continues on into the night and i want to be awake for the noon-ish xmas caroling at the Arnold Palmer Children's Hospital on Sunday and then i have an early meeting with the big cheese on Monday, so moderation, even if i miss the chance for romance that might have been falling with the fake snow in Celebration tonight…

so i journeyed over to myspace a while and exchanged a few pleasantries and settled in for a visit with the adorable eyes and fun imagination of Jo and a very special pig (just watch out for multiple popups that even slipped through Firefox's popup blocker)… and somewhere along the way, in keeping with the title of this entry, I clicked on another site that told me this:

How to make a ric

Ingredients:1 part success 3 parts brilliance 3 parts empathy

Method: Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Serve with a slice of sadness and a pinch of salt. Yum!

your name:

Personality cocktail From Go-Quiz.com

cool, maybe even eerie… emocentric, probably, but then, emotions may be the center of the infiniverse, the binding force that connects and influences all things, beyond gravity, within and without the small and large forces, a physics we have no clue about in this human form at this time in our existence… yes, there, i've told you the answer and it was not 42, that was just a bit of clever and droll british humor, after all… and distraction...

power to the people, right on…

i may never fall in love again
in this life
for what i want most does not seem to exist
in this life
but i may have said and done all this before
in this life
it may be an opportunity i missed
in this life

but i still dream now and then
that i may fall in love again
so my ridiculous repetition, the symmetric eccentric loop, the idiosyncratic kaleidoscope presented in words like colors within and beyond the rainbow continues… some may see, some may not see, but it is here… for you, for me, for posterity (ah, old faithful enigma, posterity)… so what if you were unbreakable or somehow had the ability to do something no one else could do… how separate would you be… how apart from humanity… how distant would you become… would you feel too much… would you fade to numb… would you do all you can… would you just play dumb… if you could do something no one else could do… what would you become…

what the heart wants
how can the mind choose against
what the heart wants
logic has no power over
what the heart wants
reason may never explain
what the heart wants
again and again
i suppose, in this world, the mind can choose against what the heart wants, but the likely outcome is a broken heart or a very confused being who settles for compromise and pretends that's alright… and maybe it is, but then, maybe it is not… what exists can only be known to the one who experiences it, whatever it is…

and life offers enough distractions to allow the mind to detach from the heart and create any illusion to satisfy the detached being… but some of us are so egocentric, there's no chance for the emocentric self to actualize… like walking into a room where someone is writing or watching TV or focused on something and disregarding the person in the room, but rather whining to yourself or rattling things, turning on bright lights and disrupting any activity the person in the room might have been doing simply because there is no emotional connection, no empathy, only egocentric self expressing selfish desire at any cost…

and are you the person in the room… or the person walking into the room… the latter might not know the difference and doesn't care… the former knows, but can do nothing to change the situation… for change, true change, can only come from within… unless we disregard all the rules, which is how both live, though one is focused inward and one is focused outward and therein, appear near opposites… someday we'll all understand... maybe...

time to listen now…