once again, amazed

not by the date though it might amaze me and others to make the connection that i am here today (and not just cuz so many think i ought to be out riding a sleigh at the moment… shhhh, we don’t give away secrets in the first parenthetic aside, remember?), though it's not about today, it's that i am gifting myself home this weekend as in making myself at home this weekend, something i haven't made time to do in many weekends... i am in the process of deep cleaning (sort of) and rearranging the living space (not to mention doing a ton of laundry) cuz my roommate is coming back after moving out of state for the last six months or so (she just couldn't stay away, i'm just that irresistible... ah, doesn't ego love to make everything everybody else does all about me... good job, ego... i mean, that is ego's job, after all... my job is not to believe everything ego says {and luckily i don't, but i do love taking laughing at the egocentrism seriously} and luckily i renewed the lease on this two bedroom place the day before she told me she was coming back, which is further along the path of coincidence of timing that may or may not be coincidence, though there's no real proof that there is anything else, but that's besides the point {if there is a point} and why not, this is where the babble happens after all), which will take a few days (the deep cleaning re-arranging thing i mentioned before the parenthetic rambling), and because of that (you following this yet?) i turned on the tv and the shows i found will likely influence this bit of babble tonight...

and so this is xmas, aye?... miss john… miss music… miss so many things, especially the sharing… but all the missing aside, i done good :)

as in and what have you done? (besides the another year older bit, ya know?) in case you didn’t follow that that (as opposed to the that that came before that that)… done good for the year, for the weekend so far, for the life… feeling better than ever about life, the universe, and everything and me too, which is really good considering the best of the physical experiences may be past (or passed) cuz a body does age and my sub-3 hour marathon days are probably gone cuz i don’t think i’m gonna motivate myself to work that hard anymore, but don’t be sad cuz two out of three ain’t bad, ya know, which is neither here nor there nor much to do with nothing or any other reference cuz i am losing whatever train of thought there might have been already (blame ncis if you must know) and i don’t want to drift into the wondrous stories on tv (not to mention ncis, of course, since there’s a xmas marathon going on… oh, i suppose it is a bit late for that, this that, that is)…

right, so this life continues and today was filled with long overdue work around the living spaces, laundry, unpacking, packing, cleaning, and rearranging stuff (and some cooking) cuz it is time to do what i've been putting off for weeks (and i forgot to mention the football on tv was keeping me company for a while before the movies and ncis offered more distraction rather than the xbox game occupying the body and mind... i decided to stay with the football as long as it lasted cuz if i turned on one of the many movies (it's a wonderful life, the sound of music, forrest gump, miracle on 34th st, a christmas story, the fifth element {every one a favorite, four all-time favorites... i'll let you guess which those are} and other stuff, but luckily tv does suck and torturous hatchet job on movies i don't feel i am missing any movies when they are on tv cuz when i do watch if the editing does not turn my stomach, the commercials ruin the movie experience... but still, love those movies and really ought to watch some more often and wish i had another movie loving friend to share the couch {and theatres} and that's what turning on the tv for the first time in weeks brought to mind today) i might not continue doing the house work, ya know?...


yup, the tv is on (ncis) which was just interrupted by wwe which really turns me off so i switched channels and what do i find (not eight tiny reindeer, though it's about that time, aye?), but you've got mail (another all-time favorite, though i love sleepless in seattle more... where are you movie partner?... sigh... or meg ryan, for that matter :)

lots getting done around here... laundry down to just a couple of loads of towels and bedding stuff and the kitchen is half sparkly and more than half the stuff has been put away (even folded and hung up the clothes, yeah, even the socks and underwear)... lit candles and incense and spent a comfy night at home (actually making it homey-ish) for the first time in a long long time... putting stuff away and cleaning up is kinda like moving in and starting over and that's a wonderful and exciting feeling... also a little lonely, but not so much tonight cuz it's been so long since i did it :)

i love this movie lol :)

and the writer says: be, for that matter… and speaking of (or at least i was a few paragraphs ago) living spaces and living partners and roommates and sharing, i offer the following three sided coincidence for you to toss about as we ponder the meaning of sharing, May, December, and missing teeth (cuz for a while there i was pounding away at keeping track of everything i was writing daily and then for the last few months i slipped through the cracks a lot or at least i let the keeping track of the writing do that… and perhaps the few links out of the hundreds hundreds and thousands of pages i stick like post-it notes on this internet refrigerator door each month actually mean something to you (or me, for that matter) and perhaps they are not as random as they seem (to me most of the time), for there may be no coincidences after all (and there’s no place like home, ya know… yeah, i love that movie too)…

and now, now (at least for the moment)...

and the fact that you are out there, readers and followers, that amazes me too... how can i say thank you so that it moves you as much as it moves me to know you are there?... not just a rhetorical question, but kinda leans that way, i know... i want to find more time to read you... and by read you i do not mean anything we can't tell our mothers, ok? (oh there i go being irreverent and did you know that 82% of the world is offended by irreverence and the rest just don't get it?... especially when it comes to sex, drugs, rock and roll, politics, religion, life, death, and all the ways people mame, torture, and kill each other... not to mention dental hygiene, or genital, for that matter... i mean, would you be offended if i ask how often you brush?... can i watch?)... the statistical analysis may have been a bit flawed, but it's amazing how many people are offended by my simple teasing... i hope you won't be, i mean no harm, and if my hand slipped up your dress it was just an accident, really it was... unless, of course, you wanted it there... but then, of course (again), if you sat on my hand by mistake, i forgive you too...

if you are not laughing then you really need to loosen up (i mean, these are words on the internet, after all... a simple distraction from whatever you were doing before you started reading, like playing your xbox, ya know? :)

there were so many things on my mind when i first came here and some of them might still be there and some may have found their way into this bit of babble and i may be back to add a bit at some future date (which may drive the critics crazy, but then, oh, i'll leave those dots for you to connect), but life has been so busy with work and with fun offline of late that i barely can keep track of the date and time when i want to, no less spend the hours writing about it that i do so love to do too… i hope to be back to write more here (there and everywhere) soon… i do miss you… and i do miss the writing (for whatever worth the words may be to you or anyone else, they are a blessingto me… and yes, it is that simple (or at least i am, beneath the layers of complexity, that is)…

make today a gift for yourself by recognizing that it is…

m’ok? :)