musical dreamer

MUSIC: Eagles - On The Border
Jen Chapin - Light of Mine

yeah, come unto me... the amusement of splashing deep into the waters, or from another perspective, passing threough many layers of the onion for but a moment, as through a pool of water, slipping deep and rising before the layers are permanently disturbed... that is what music does for me... it is a feeling that can only be described as truth... and though rarely does a single song or collection of songs get it all in, there are times when i've come close when the muses lead me from song to song and produced a collection... oh, how i miss my collections when they come back to mind... nobody told me there's be days like these... and this entry comes from the interesting mix of the two cds you really ought to know...

meanwhile, back in the real, sort of... perhaps this is the real, influenced... anyway, the music for this entry takes me back to a wondrously mystical and magical space in my head... for those who forgot the words, those who live in chains never even know they have the key... there i was torn between being already gone and wanting to share it, most peculiar momma... and you never cry like a lover... way back in the early years i understood these words, decades of trying to be human helped me to forget, what i've learned i'll teach you now if you care to know, all the trying to change me only left me with regret... focus on 1, 2, 4, 5, 7, 8, and 10 this time, if you want a road back home and find the best of my love was always waiting inside no matter where i'd roam...

way back in the beginning, the first book, did i lose that too?... did i leave it in someone's care, only to hear an evil taunting laugh tell me it was pissed on and tossed out with the trash where it belonged?... sometimes the nightmares blur and i forget what is in storage and what is truly lost... this cd was close to the beginning, played right around that time in a room filled with acid and my head trip and music (could there have been room for anything else?... lucky the pen and paper fit, aye?)... and i thought it was all so profound, so meaningful, so valuable, so real... all for someone, the one, as i stepped away and back to the one, round and round from the first to the last all the same... and she may never know, you may never know i may never know, who knows... once in love...

so i tried to connect to blogspot today and found the wiley security spiders at corporate blocked the site... they didn't block my calendar yet, but it's probably only a matter of time... i used to be the only one in the place who could access blogs and myspace and all those sites everybody else had blocked... alas, another day of wqithdrawal from the netscape of dreams, the home on the web, the written gardens... did you know there were pages with those names, i mean titles, way back in the beginning of my time on the net when anonanonanon would live in cyber chat rooms and babble on without reservation or inhibition or reason or rhyme... ok, maybe the occasional rhyme...

so now, back in the real, we have another reason to consider the new laptop, but then, perhaps the att everywhere card will magically open the door to a whole new world of connectivity even on the work laptop that i will get eventually... i do intend to take the old work laptop to miami next week... which means i'll take it home over the weekend... if i remember... i forgot it last time i went on a trip... was that me being ethical or virtuous or noble or something?... whatever...

anyway, as if it's the most natural thing in the world, the music plays the moment i am in space i can call my own and the tv is barely missed (though i would record some shows if i was connected and remembered... Eureka, Heroes, Sarah Conner, and others... some shows that provide a fair mix of stimulation for the imagination, the heart, and the libido... the draw is just not strong enough to pay for the privilege... still, now that ther music seems to be playing naturally again, you'll probably see me catching up with myself over at the cd stacks, though i doubt i'll find time to dig into the musical journeys that barely got started online before they were stabbed in the back (because that is what humans do to unconditional trust, after all, and music, for me, has always brought out the unconditional from once there was a way back home to if it takes forever i will wait for you)... ok yeah, jen wants to rock my gypsy soul just like in the days of old... sweet... and into the mystic... and that's when they broke the mold...

thank you jen...