untitled mission

because i can and have nothing else to do because i am alone again and reruns of Futurama are simply not enough stimulation for the senses or synapses in the skull on the shoulders of the body in which i find myself at the moment, and most of the time, for that matter, i come here again to spread my merry wares and provide the words that shall drift into obscurity almost as fast as i can type them…

it is raining… it is the first rain i can remember in quite some time… which reminds me of the time i went out running in the rain… naked… the rain was pretty naked too… it was the middle of the night and it just had to be done… the neighborhood was never ever the same again, at least not from my perspective… but those were the good old days when i actually ran around for miles and miles and exercised daily and danced each night away… ah yes, the nineties…

life has not been all that organized this past week… instead of going to work and then going to some meetup every day and coming home tired and happy about socializing, i've been vegetating and distracting myself with occasional glances at the TV and chameleoning into the couch potato life here at home while hardly sleeping and feeling too tired to do anything (the lazy loop) and feeling lonely for company and interaction… though i am happy i shared all this with you and tickled pick when you find some way to respond…

earlier i went to Jackson's place to watch the UCF game… my lazy weekend kept me awake until past sunrise, so i did not wake at 9am to get to Sea World with the strangers in the meetup group and the group at Jackson's place sounded more appealing to my subconscious, which makes the decisions while i am sleeping… unfortunately, alas and oh well, UCF (the local university team) quarterback gave the game away throwing three or four interceptions and losing a fumble and getting nothing done on offense (yes, it was 90%, at least, one person's fault) and the great game the rest of the team played was negated and they lost 10 to 3… bummer…

another bummer was the jerk cop who gave me a speeding ticket as i was rushing over to Jackson's to catch the game… obviously not a UCF fan as he delayed me almost a half hour after i explained why i was speeding and asked him to be a good community supporter and understand… he could have just written the ticket and sent me on my way, but he was smirking as he sat in his car a twenty minutes and then gave me a ten minute speech about speeding… when he was done and asked if i had any questions i said no, but as he turned to walk away i said i'll be sure not to speed the day Michigan destroys Florida… he reeled around and that's when i was sure he was a Florida fan and my talking about UCF was a big reason he gave me the ticket and delayed me so long… i asked him if there was anything else and he just glared, to his credit, because it showed he was smart enough to not do or say anything to prove his underlying motive, which would be highly unethical and very embarrassing to the sheriff's department… so i laughed and drove off with him standing there glaring at me and his smirk was gone, but it'll cost me about $200…

luck of the draw, as there were at least four cars driving the same speed i was as we passed the speed trap, one just ahead of me and two right behind me… some cops just respond negatively to the long hair and the red cavalier… it's my first ticket in five or more years, i think, cuz i am usually much more aware of the speed traps around here… hopefully my insurance doesn't go up…

meanwhile, the home environment is as dead as ever… no exercise, no life, no socializing, no movement, really, except for food… so the garbage and clutter and mess remains and i must resist the laziness to continue motivating myself to move around and get out more for social life and exercise…

and poor Raspy… he drinks Diet Pepsi non-stop (and that's all he calls a "drink" when he is thirsty and wants a "drink") and then wonders why he is always warm and thirsty… look at the data on caffeine and aspartame and you find it plays with the brain parts that control thirst and body heat, tricking the brain into believing the body is dehydrating and overheating… Precious is the same (though she substitutes sugar and fat for aspartame) and adds close to a hundred pounds of unnecessary fat… they always complain that it's too hot when i don't have the air-conditioning down to below seventy degrees… unfortunately, that means my electric bill stays high because the air conditioning is never cool enough for them… lately i've kept the windows open and am loving the fresh air, but even in winter it gets close to eighty degrees (or more) during the day most days… but that's why i moved down here… i love the heat… and living in the hermetically sealed air-conditioned space just adds to the not-me environment (mess) this space has become over the years…

so my mission, jim, is to accept my mission, which is to extricate myself from the heavy gooey laziness that smothers energy and life in this environment (and stuffs it with fats and sugars and the typical "american" diet)… and as i wrote this, i failed… yes, tomorrow's entry will explain in more detail, i suppose, but since this entry is being completed tomorrow you might as well know that it was just interrupted by a trip out to a downtown chinese dim sum place for some excellent dim sum… $30 i did not need to spend… a ton of fatty food i did not need to eat… but so it goes around these parts… maybe next week i will have more will power…

so my mission, jim, is to accept my mission…

and meanwhile, you are wonderful to be here, it's certainly a thrill, you're such a lovely audience i'd like to take you home with me i'd love to take you home… and my egocentric fantasy about being rich and famous continues as i spend money i would better spend on more useful things (as if i am rich) and i write silly thoughts about the many fans out there waiting for my next bit of babble (as if i am famous) and not to mention, good (so why am i giggling… cuz i love it when i mock myself, you know)… when will the positive influence come along?... when i let it?... when somebody cares?... it's so much more the latter than the former, really, if you know knew… but hope springs eternal again and again… so cheer yourself on and i'll cheer myself on and we can cheer each other on from afar and appreciate it cuz it is so much worth the value of the relatively little time we spend here…

and think healthy thoughts…

nite nite :)