we interrupt today's second entry

instead of the second entry that i was gonna be posting any moment now, i shall provide the jam master z a piece of his massive missive as requested because expectations without fruition lead to disappointments and we all know how i cringe at disappointing anyone (that makes two)...

i've missed your brilliant axe...

yup, right, you are correct sir... i'll still find references to amuse me though, like Ed and Johnny and Carnak the Magnifiscent cuz that's more fun that wallowing in the pity party, for me at least...

this music mix, for instance, is one of the journeys through the roller coaster of bliss and depression (cuz being manic is more fun than being catatonic for me and this first music mix is for me... somebody's gotta indulge the child, after all :)

the recent entries are kind of cleaning house, sorting out the experience of living here, we three, and how i experience it and how i feel about it... it's probably not the proper human thing to do, publishing it all here, but then, i've never said i was trying to be the proper human, just a human (and i'm losing interest in that endeavor lately, but that's probably the seeds of another blog)...

i think i might want to try some arrogance in for size cuz all this goody goody stuff sure hasn't worked (except to make me a giggling doormat)...

on another thought stream, i am too happy by myself when i stop being here in this human world where physical love and the illusion of flesh bonding ethereal beings is so possible... that is why i keep coming back to the lonely days, lonely nights, where would i be without my woman (BeeGees) saga that keeps me pretty much in high school... it was fun there and is still fun of dreaming of sharing such emotional drama (hoping for the bliss part) again...

but there's still the irony that every complaint, every whine, every stupid feeling, every depressed hole, every arrogant assness, every negative thought, whether i want it to or not and whether i let it out or not, ends in the dream... just look at the impromptu "CD" i just put together before coming here to read your comments:

Any Old Kind of Day Blackbird/Yesterday When You're A Free Man Everybody's Lonely A Day In The Life Lonely People Short Stories First Episode At Hienton Talking To My Angel Oh Daddy New Horizons Song For Myself Our House

Harry Chapin Beatles Moody Blues Harry Chapin Beatles America Harry Chapin Elton John Melissa Etheridge Fleetwood Mac Moody Blues Harry Chapin Crosby, Stills, Nash, & Young

oh, wait, the comment box doesn't allow such HTML... my bad, i'll just turn it into an entry as i usually do when i comment a lot cuz i am so desperately begging for attention and wouldn't want to waste a word la la la...

see next entry :)